True'Soul

Money can't buy happiness, but its more comfortable to cry in a BMW than on a bicycle ...

Forgive your enemy, but remember that bastard's name...

Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.

Many people are alive only because its illegal to shoot them..

Alcohol doesn't solve any problem,but neither does juice.

Smoking kills, but if you don't smoke, doesn't mean you'll never die....

For Laughter

Some interesting wordings from a friend.

Woman asks: If I sleep with 3men, everyone calls me a slut. But when a man sleeps with 8 girls, everyone calls him a real man. How come?

Confucius say: "It's very simple. When one lock can be opened by 3 different keys, it's a bad lock. But when one key can open 8 different locks, we call it a master key."

Confucius is one brilliant man! I couldn stop laughing at this!

✿The Husband Store ✿

A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

The woman reads the sign and says to herself, “Well, that’s better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what’s further up?”

So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.

The woman remarks to herself, “That’s great, but I wonder what’s further up?” And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.

“Hmm, better” she says. “But I wonder what’s upstairs?”

The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.

“Wow!” exclaims the woman, “very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!” And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak.

“Oh, mercy me! But just think… what must be awaiting me further on?” So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 - You a re visitor 3,456,789,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at The Husband Store and have a nice day!

Author Unknown

✿ ATtiTuDE ✿

Don't get confused 

between 

my personality and my attitude. 

My personality is who I am, 

my attitude depends on who you are.

♥ Gender Talks ♥

You may not know that many nonliving things have a gender.
For example…

1. Ziploc Bags- They are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

2. Copiers- They are Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm them up again. It’s an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

3. Tire- Male, because it goes bald and it’s often over-inflated.

4. Hot Air Balloon- Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there’s the hot air part.

5. Sponges- Female, because they’re soft, squeezable and retain water.

6. Web Page- Female, because it’s always getting hit on.

7. Subway- Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

8. Hourglass- Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

9. Hammer- Male, because it hasn’t changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it’s handy to have around.

10. Remote Control- Female… Ha! You thought it’d be male. But consider this-it gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying..✿‿✿

✿ FaMiLy BlUeS ✿

✿ LiFe is A JoUrNey ✿

♥ StaGes OF SleePiNEss ♥

♥ ReAL WoRLd♥

♥LaWs oF tHe NaTuRaL UnIvErSe♥

----> Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

----> Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

----> Law of probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

----> Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

----> Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

----> Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)

----> Bath Theorum:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

----> Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

----> Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

----> Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

----> Theatre Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

----> Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

----> Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

----> Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

----> Law of Location:
No matter where you go,... there you are.

----> Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible... if you don't know what you are talking about.

----> Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

----> Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

----> Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.